The super-ficial and not so super
Yesterday seemed to be another passing day the only significance to it was the fact that I some how managed to turn a year older. But as my friends say I never grow up. I wonder…is it possible to get older but stay young?
This train of thought naturally leads me to one of my all time favourite books…Peter Pan, the boy who never wanted to grow up. Sounds a bit like me but the whole move to Johannesburg has changed that. I’ve grown in leaps and bounds and have found out the hard way that I really cannot tolerate most women (or rather I cannot tolerate them while I live with them).
The freedom also has gotten to me but I miss home enough to be excited with the prospect of leaving and driving 600km on my own just to see home again.
Anyway on a different note…you know we always ask ourselves what models really get up to… well moi had the pleasure of some how being chosen to do a little short photo-shoot session (along with a few others from M&G) for our advertising and marketing feature on the M&G Cabinet Report Card. I set out with three other women from M&G and I will tell you that they are gorgeous people. Anyway we head off to the photo-shoot and surprise surprise I feel like I’m finally in the wrong profession.
I mean in which office can you conduct a photo-shoot and find the kitchen lady cooking for you all at once. Wait not a kitchen lady but a COOK!!! Anyway back to the point…
And it was all over as fast as it began…so really how hard can it be being a model?
Well from the few friends I know who do it as a living it is harder then the simple shoot I visited on this day, but maybe this little shoot will make me famous lol (I doubt it – all they wanted was my chubby cheeks *giggles*). The whole trying to give what the public want to meet instant gratification is definitely an ugly business. The modelling world is no different but this is one area I will not foray into in the near future.
On a different note…we are heading to Polokwane, to see in the new President of the African National Congress and most probably the new president of
What about the ANC’s future plans, those that the new president will implement. How will they look to govern the future and the lands and people in it? Will they take a new stance on the policy of HIV/AIDS in
Theses are the ultimate questions we should be asking but we seem so caught up in the one of who will rule that we have left these on the wayside. Sure the new president would be the influential power but he will not be going at it alone. These few questions come from a bigger pot that needs asking and these questions will ultimately then decide who will be the ruler of
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You and I
We meet as strangers,
each carrying a mystery within us.
I cannot say who you are.
I may never know you completely.
But i trust that you are a person in your own right,
possessed of a beauty and value that are the Earth's richest treasures.
So i make this promise to you:
I will impose no identities upon you,
but will invite you to become yourself
without shame or fear.
I will hold open a space for you in the world
and allow your right to fill it with an authentic vocation and purpose.
For as long as your search takes,
you have my loyalty.
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38 Random Things
I have been tagged by my Mauro, From 1 million love messages so hear goes.
1. Name one person who made you laugh last night?
My cousin Zee
2. What were you doing at 0800?
In the Bathroom :)
3. What were you doing 30 minutes ago?
Lol supposedly working ;)
4. What happened to you in 2006?
Too many things the usual rollercoaster ride
5. What was the last thing you said out loud?
Was talking about FRIENDS to my work collegue (go figure coz I dnt even watch the programme)
6. How many beverages did you have today?
mmmm water only :P
7. What colour is your hairbrush?
Black
8. What was the last thing you paid for?
hmmmm lets see I know I will be paying tonight for something but last thing was a packet of chips…Simba RRRROOOOOAAAARRRRR
9. Where were you last night?
At home with cuz and friends and madhouse roomies :P
10. What colour is your front door?
White
11. Where do you keep your change?
wallet, pocket, car, draws
12. What’s the weather like today?
Sunny yay :D
13. What’s the best ice-cream flavour?
Chocolate, but urrr any icecream in my book!!!!! You heard BUY ME ICECREAM!!!!
14. What excites you?
Friends fun life adrenalin speed
15. Do you want to cut your hair?
Actually yes but I cnt figure out how…help
16. Are you over the age of 25?
Not yet :P
17. Do you talk a lot?
Loads and loads and loads and never stop lol unless to listen me good at listening too (I hope)
18. Do you watch the O.C.?
Nope
19. Do you know anyone named Steven?
mmmm Steven Wright mmmm Steven Gerrad but not on personal levels lol
20. Do you make up your own words?
Yes most def okies pokies yummylicious
21. Are you a jealous person?
No I’m not. Sadly proved a problem (go figure) lol But yes I am a woman so I think at times I do but not over a bf I mean he is mine isn’t so why be jealous???
22. Name a friend whose name starts with the letter ‘A’
Aadila
23. Name a friend whose name starts with the letter ‘K’
Kavit
24. Who’s the first person on your received call list?
mmm wait I check lol….mmmm it says withheld but I think it was the bank
25. What does the last text message you received say
Sorry cant tell hehehehe
26. Do you chew on your straw?
mmm only when I’m drinking and thinking
27. Do you have curly hair?
Nopes! But I would like
28. Where’s the next place you’re going to?
Madhouse
29. Who’s the rudest person in your life?
Some chickys I stay with lol Not my fault i have to stay with the inconsiderate fools
30. What was the last thing you ate?
Pasta (leftovers for lunch)
31. Will you get married in the future?
I hope so! Mmmm maybe we’ll see
32. What’s the best movie you’ve seen in the past 2 weeks?
Stardust
33. Is there anyone you like right now?
No Comment
34. When was the last time you did the dishes?
mmm Friday maybe usually do them on Saturdays (no maid) or whenever i can't handle too many in the sink.
35. Are you currently depressed?
No comment again lol
36. Did you cry today?
No...the day aint over :P
37. Why did you answer and post this?
Because Mauro tagged me and then said he would be interested in my answers lol so why not…
38. Tag 5 people who would do this survey.
mmmmm all those on my list and everyone who reads this… o and then let me know when you do it so I can read all about you J
Words...Pictures...
O where is my head I have not mentioned the conflict that my love for words has put me in. the little incident revolves around the status message space on Gtlk. My love for words has mad this place an exciting view into my arb insights. They range from quotes to words I've read somewhere and loved as well as binary coding -- guys you should check out this site that converts anything you want into binary, way easier then doing it yourself like back in school.
So I placed a few words there that some person had written and it was not a famous person so googling the words were of no use. A friend reads it and well then there is that little break down in communication and understanding. It was blown out of context and well made me wonder if people in fact saw me as a fragile individual who needed to be looked after and who constantly throws mixed signals to her friends? Hmmmm maybe I am in need of looking after but I seriously would never send mix signals unless I have no idea that I am.
The whole idea of what we write not necessarily being your own work seems to slip by people and then again what we do in life echoes in our words and pictures and who we are...what a mish mash of different communications skills can do to you. Must make it difficult for a president/spokesperson. They would constantly have to watch what they say, write and do...very similar to a celebrity in ways then as well.
Join the Boks
The Boks after their win will celebrate across the country...where to find them read on...
read more | digg story
Think I'm missing Durban too much!But Why?
This was mailed to me the other day by a dear friend. I think the person was having a slight mid-life crisis but then i realized that its the same questions we ask each other or ourselves everyday.
I haven't edited anything from what was sent because there is no need to... If people have answer to the questions or opinions drop in a comment...
Why does one love? why does one pine for another...
Why does life sometimes seem to be sooo sooo good, but then at times it feels like you got hit by a bus, or you rather be dead then alive?
when does one fall in love? When does one fall out of love?
does love exist? or is it a figment of our imagination?
what is our purpose in life? do we have a purpose? is der a greater purpose that we dont know? are we a governed on what we do? if so, den wats our purpose?
have u ever wondered if ders life other den us? do they have intelligence?
what is the difference in men and women? is there a difference other then pyhsical? why do we love each other? n why do some love the same?
what is sex? male female in pure extacy? have you experienced an orgasm? how did it feel? why do men love sex more then women?
we came so far, yet we are so backward, but why? we put man on the moon, but a rapist walks the streets? have we lost our common values for higher technology? are we moving backward rather forward?
well, all i can say.... i got up on the wrong side of the bed this morning as u can c... just thought i will share my madness with you…
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Blogging on another level
So I haven’t blogged in ages…and no blog critic and gang hasn’t scared me away. I’ve just been busy with relocations and a new job lol
This post in itself is a bit of self proclamation. Mmmm maybe more like self ‘egolation’ (yes a new made up word :P). So people are finally talking about blogging in SA, I mean what with the annoying Stork advert (I think rah dished the dirt out on that one) and the new era of Facebook why am I reposting my article here?
Well while I was doing it I found it incredibly amazing that the actual number of bloggers in SA can’t be measured. Vincent (mentioned in the article) suggests that every SA blogger should atleast register with Amatomu so that in future Goldstuck and gang can get more precise and accurate figures of bloggers in SA.
So I’m guessing you asking what this has got to do with us mere bloggers who write absolute ‘shit’ and who aimlessly talk about life - well the more the media market know who we are the more we can benefit from it. Not only are advertisers after our money we can in fact make money from advertisers. The whole concept of Web2.0 (I learnt about this only recently) makes the internet an open source platform to use and share alike.
Mak (sorry mak i couldn't find your actual post plz send link so i can change it no time compromises a comprehensive search :)) has spoken about piracy in his blog posts before, well now with Web 2.0 and the blogging and Facebooking and YouTube platforms there’s going to be more and more of it. The media is changing its focus and now making it easier to obtain items through the web so I’m sure at the end of it all we won’t be charged with piracy. :D.
SA blogs on the rise
Zahira Kharsany Johannesburg, South Africa
06 Sep 2007 17:00
Something is stirring in the South African blogosphere. This year will probably be remembered as a time when blogs came of age, with more than 600 000 internet users visiting blogs by their fellow South Africans in just one month. Electronic-media analyst Arthur Goldstuck has provided the online world with relevant South African statistics on the number of bloggers in South Africa for the month of August 2007.
In a blog entry posted this week on the Mail & Guardian Online's Thought Leader, Goldstuck says he believes that by August next year, "blogs will not only be a mainstream component of most online media in South Africa, but they will also be a dominant component".
"In terms of social media and networking spaces, the shift in numbers has increased greatly. Facebook, which has had a three-fold increase in the past three months, is the symptom of the tipping point," he told the M&G Online on Thursday.
Goldstuck -- who heads the World Wide Worx research organisation and regularly provides insights and IT trend analyses to businesses and governments in Africa -- said the number of South African bloggers in relation to the number of web users in the country is still low, but it is, in fact, an astonishing achievement.
One indicator of the growth of blogs is the rise of local blog aggregators -- that is, guides to what is being read by others. Examples are Afrigator, the continent's first blog aggregator; and the recently launched Amatomu, the first comprehensive tracking service for blogs and bloggers in South Africa. Goldstuck's statistics show there were 25 037 blogs in South Africa at the end of August, though only 11% were active.
According to Vincent Maher, the M&G Online's strategist, the number of unique blog visitors during August, 621 204, would place blogs overall among South Africa's five most popular websites. This number, said Maher, lends credibility to the way the internet and its use is moving forward: it promotes collaboration between and sharing among users.
Goldstuck's information was sourced from South Africa's various blogging platforms, and he "interrogated" blogging services to ensure he could publish a true reflection of blogging in the country. Previously, educated guesses had been the order of the day. Some of these proved to be fairly accurate, despite the methodology being a few steps removed from augury.
Looking ahead, he sees more blogging growth in the next few months "and then it will level off".
"By the end of the year we should see the number of [South African] internet users increase to 3,85-million, and broadband subscriptions will increase by 828 000. This will bring greater media attention until such time blogging will find its natural niche," he said.
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Loss
I've experienced loss on many levels. But the finality of loss is even harder to bear. The ultimate type of loss to me is that of death. And some how everyone i know has experienced it one way or the other.
So whats the whole point of this...well my helplessness is the point.
My non-worthiness (another made up word i know) and my uselessness at not being able to find the right words and to make it all okay. A dear friend loses someone who means the world to them and i can't find the words to make it all okay. Utter helplessness i guess is what i feel. I wish i could give the said friend a huge hug and hold friend close and say it'll be okay but i would be lying...its not okay to lose it hurts like hell and years down the line it'll still hurt. the most i guess i can do is to let said friend know that they not alone and that their friends are there if they ever need to talk or to be held...a hug goes along way (o so i think)...but then again who am i to think????
I only have lost a few times and the one that i still feel the most about happened almost a decade ago. To think 1992 seems like yesterday to me *sigh*... proves the point that loss always remains within you and the pain you felt then you'll feel a million yrs on...
the most i can tell you dear friend is that you and your family are in my duas and so is every other person who has lost and who i know...
i find solace in my friends and i hope said friend will find solace in us....
mwah
XOXOXOXOXOXO
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HELP
So this is a cry out for help...
I've never packed like this before i have no idea where to start...i'm going crazy becuase i don't feel like starting lol....
Peoples please help....
Yah I'm a first timer in this sense, the most i've ever packed was the usual overseas trips and stuf but those meant i was coming home even if it was after a month...this is so new too me i'm supposed to pack for a year (yes i know things can be sent to me after but if you know me you'll also know i want stuf now and now lol no waiting for it)...the most i have packed is mmmm ZILCH!!!!
HELP!!!!!!!!
oooo i'm going car shopping tomorrow doesnt that feel wierd lol
car shopping like i'm going to the supermarket....mmmm can i hav a bit of gear lock and sum power steering and a blast of aircon....oooo dnt forget the radio on the side....:P
mad i tell you absolutely mad
*EVIL ME* |__|
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Moments...
So i have been neglecting the blog a bit (according to some people) but honestly i haven't.
I just wanted the previous post to fester a bit :D
O well let me write...
Do you get those moments in life when its so peaceful and perfect...those moments when you alone and its only you and your thoughts??? I'm not talking about the period before you sleep but rather of the times when you awake...
Do you Get them????
Well i was lucky to have to such purrfect moments this last weekend...wel seriously just two such moments...and they were both in an aeroplane :D
Moments like those you just want to take out your pen and remember it all...but i couldn't... i let a perfect moment pass me by and i had no regrets about it.
When i should have been abale to write and express everything that sends me over the edge...i decided not to...My thoughts are my minds eyes...
Anyway on a different note...
I flew to Johannesburg this last weekend for an interview (i think my new employers are reading this :) but i still gotta write what i want too). The interview was awesome...though i felt out of depth for a bit, and maybe i came across as over chatty and a know it all...but honestly I'm not i have to keep learning and experiencing. I guess thats the main reason i wanted this job so badly. I want the challenge!!!
I honestly don't want to move to Jhb but if i have to i have to and this oppurtunity is too good to pass up...i'm lucky and fortunate to get it so i'm gonna grab it with all i have and hopefully learn more then i ever did at campus. (Campus lies when they say they preparing you for the future...its all a hoax i tell ya!!!!)
So guess whose the new junior at Mail and Guardian.....*Zah grins from ear to ear* :D
I promise all my friends to see them before i leav glorious Durban...but till then i am madly busy...still gotta giv in resignation letter...find accomodation...get me some wheels...and try and find my footing....
PEOPLE PRAY FOR ME
*efg*
*Me Evil* |__|
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Ramblings on a Miniscule scale…
So first order of business…something I’ve been trying to get my head around and couldn’t since Saturday…yes it’s taken me almost a week to write about it but hey I writing it NOW…
Last week (in SA and across the world) was a week in Solidarity with the People of Palestine. So what has this got to do with Saturday? Well I need to vent the fact that I felt disheartened and angry at people in SA, especially those in Durban. Why why why?????
For starters these same people swear that they will fight the fight The Jihad against the Zionist Jews. They will give up house and home and family to go to Palestine and fight, yet they could not take a few hours from their day on Saturday to attend a rally that was held across the glove to show that they stand in solidarity with the people in Palestine and those displaced from the country through the ongoing fighting and forced removals. The same people who say they ‘fought’ against the Apartheid government so that we (the next generation) could live in a democratic country. These very same people, who also say they fight for freedom of all people, could not spend a few hours at a rally…shame on us shame on us shame on us….the people of SA. This utter disappointment is not aimed at the Muslims in SA only but at the hundreds and thousands of South Africans who believe in our freedom and the freedom of everyone. But in all honesty my anger was leveled at the MUSLIM DURBANITES….the Muslim community on Saturday made me want to strangle their pretty necks…What laughing stocks we must be to the Zionists, the Israelis and the International world… I swear at time like these I wish I was a Capetonian…10 000 people showed up to pledge their support…and Jhb also had almost 5 000 people…Durban sigh I will not comment on. I was there covering the event as a journalist. I wish I wasn’t there in that capacity…why? Well I need my anger to be voiced and I couldn’t. I was there to do a job and a job I had to do…I will def say that even though the ANC were there to conduct their own meetings they spared a few moments to remind us that….”there are three kinds of evil in this world…the first is the evil of the oppressor […] the second is the evil of being a watcher [ …] and the third evil is that of not doing anything to stop the first two evils…” – Sbu Ndebele (Premier of KZN) [urr sorry can’t remember exact exact words will watch the tape again and make adjustments accordingly]
So what form of evil are the Muslim people of Durban? (*sarcasm insinuated here*)
So on to my next issue…the civil servants strike…to all those who are complaining about it you guys should really start looking at what kind of people you really are…
Why? Lol
As many of you have noted SA doesn’t seem to be functioning in the ‘correct way’. What do I mean by that…well over the last few days I’ve heard various complaints about how they should all get back to work people are dying people are stranded things seem to be messed up right?
Duh definitely!!!! If our government and all the complainers can’t see what a beneficial asset these civil servants are in our lives you sure are noticing now. Yes people are dying at hospitals…but people are dying all the time in SA due to AIDS, poverty, health and crime etc. No I’m not being evil I’m trying to get the point across that these people work everyday of their lives in horrid conditions and they serve ‘us’ yes us. They keep our country running smoothly from day to day and they care and tend to patients who can put their lives at risk but they do it because its their ‘job’ and with out them we left as we are now…in a bad place!!!
And how can you turn away from those who have taught you in life…do our teachers not count as our parents our nurturers our second families???? So what many of you have gone to private schools but even then you know how much your teachers are shaping you are caring for you and are providing you with the skills to be ‘PEOPLE’!!!! These teachers are teaching your future presidents and ministers…your doctors and nurses…your businessmen and women…will you not care for their needs? The government has a surplus of wealth within their coffers (according to the last speech by the finance minister Trevor Manual); so should they not at least put part of it to those who teach our leaders?
Maybe at this venture I should leave it be so that people can mull over it but my mind is running on to so many other issues I want to talk about…. But please keep the above more in mind then what I will express below…
I’m a journalist right…so I should be objective in my ideas and writings right? (This is one for MJ we have argued this before but I will rant again here…) so why do I have this notion that no journalist is ever objective…why? Because we already formulated into a model that fits society. We grow up learning certain aspects regarding culture and society and ethics and institutionalized ideologies. Why am I going on about this well for the mere fact that I was reminded that I should be writing in an objective capacity while at the same time being told the paper has certain ‘ideas’ about a certain issue. Yes I know the political economy of the media is a big player in all of this ( I mean that was my fortay of study – I tutored and did honors in it) but it still leaves me very disillusioned about the whole idea of the media and whether objective reporting is a utopian ideology conceived by theorists who wished to push their own agenda (yes people figure that one out…I’m sure one of you clever nuts could J).
Another arb point in these ramblings is the need to express what power memories have in a persons life…yes very different from my above mentioned rambles, but also very relevant in any sense one may wish to perceive it. So I’ve been tripping down memory lane again and its been a wild trip. And I don’t mind doing it OCCASIONALLY. Been missing some lost friends and wondering whether there’s ever a right time for anything and whether having regrets now makes a difference. L me wonders if I will ever be able to get a chance to make things right with those I have wronged or I feel I have wronged…its hard I guess more when some of them are no longer with us in this world, but it also made me realized that I can do something about those who still are around. I can make it right with them! So I have set out making things right I hope though some people well I can’t seem to get through to on any level but atleast I know I’ve tried and I feel better about doing so. Also been tripping over good memories…the kind that makes you all warm and fuzzy inside wishing you could have them back. Memories have a certain power all of their own…they either make you cry, sad, happy, warm, fuzzy or neurotic. I like my memories I like that I can share things with so many people that others may never know about. “our little secrets” ( a song comes to mind lol)…anyway enough with all this…I’m out to make more memories and all my friends are invited :D
So my ramblings have some what come to the end…I told you before if I go on it will never stop…so I should stop here now before I kill thee of boredom…and no this is not my return just yet…this is my infintismal need to put words in a pot and stew them around…hopefully leading to the fulfillment of a master piece….go figure!!!
Peace
I’m outta here…
* efg *
*ME EVIL* __
Taken in CBD - Durban (i'm in love with town...the architecture, people and
excitement that breaths beneath the pale gray coverings of our eyes)
Girly R&R Moment
and dryed my hair....
amazingly all this while not running that late for work
O the other thing i wanted to R&R about is the fact that pple should never ever have open plan offices!!!!
God forbid i drag the next person to irritate me by the hair and chuck him/her out of the 7th floor window
*EFG*
*ME EVIL* __
Toodles...for Now...I hope...
Since i will be away for a bit and will be neglecting all my wonderful friends and fellow bloggers and the world of blogging...I feel i should leave you all in the presence of something sweet and indulgent....mmmm enjoy...miss me and MWAH
.jpg)
PS: Dessert is called Pavlova...was made for my cousins wedding week by moi!!!Who would have thought!!!PPS: have you guys noticed the autosave on blogger...yay finally no more losing my posts!!!!!
Do not undermine your worth by
Comparing yourself with others.
It is because we are different
That each of us is special.
Do not set your goals by what
Other people deem important.
Only you know what is best for you.
Do not take for granted the things
Closest to your heart.
Cling to them as you would your life,
for without them, life is meaningless.
Do not let your life slip through your fingers
By living in the past nor for the future.
By living your life one day at a time,
You live all the days of your life.
Do not give up when you
Still have something to give.
Nothing is really over until the
Moment you stop trying.
It is a fragile thread that
Binds us to each other.
Do not be afraid to encounter risks.
It is by taking chances
That we learn how to be brave.
Do not shut love out of your life by
Saying it is impossible to find.
The quickest way to receive
Love is to give love;
The fastest way to lose love
Is to hold it too tightly;
In addition, the best way to keep
Love is to give it wings.
Do not dismiss your dreams.
To be without dreams
Is to be without hope;
To be without hope
Is to be without purpose.
Do not run through life
So fast that you forget
Not only where you have been,
But also where you are going.
Life is not a race,
But a journey to be savoured
Each step of the way.
Bowling ScoreSheet...hahahaha
So the bowling was a blast and we had a huge gang....
hmmm lets just say we didnt really care about the final scores ;)
*Just a btw Neo = Arshad go figure why that name but Mazozo insisted on it lol Arsh go fight with him :)
Asad I'm sorry they spelt your name wrong please forgive me!!!
For full details on our brilliant night with friends check out Safs place. For a total hilarious analysis on our escapade see !Joe!
She always seems to capture moments in their true forms
To all those who were not there...hint hint jhb, pe and ct guys mmmm well when you come to the good place...DURBAN...we promise to have even more fun lol
Mike Shinoda - LP...for the die hards who understand :)
| " | "It couldn't be more exciting to give you all new music, especially after all the hard work we put into it. This album was almost a year and a half of experiments, mistakes, inspiration, and careful craftsmanship. We put everything we had into these songs, and want you to hear every second of it. I can't wait for you to absorb all the levels of meaning in the songs, and the layers of music, eventually forming your own ideas about what the songs mean to you. At the same time, a leak leaves out some very important parts of this piece of work. We put months of creative energy into the ART of the record, in the booklet, special edition, and big book...almost as long as it took to record hybrid theory (sic). The album has amazing photos, lyrics, and notes about how the songs came together--it's the visual half of the record. On the other hand, the super-special-edition book is packed with exclusive images, stories of the making of the songs, gorgeous art, the CD and a DVD that tells the story, showing the actual moments of inspiration caught on camera. For me, it's almost hard to imagine anyone really experiencing this album without that part of it. Even the song sequence alone is very important. It's WAY different to hear the songs in a random order than to listen to this record from beginning to end. At the very least, if you've already downloaded the songs, do us a huge favor and listen to them in the right order...it'll be way more rewarding." | „ |
| —Mike Shinoda | ||
MINUTES TO MIDNIGHT...AWESOME!!!
yes peeps some how i got hold of it and its awesome!!!
Less than a day ago the new Linkin Park album, Minutes To Midnight, was leaked onto the internet. Thanks to Pavan Ramdhani and Avinash Narain we have the download link for the torrent.
DUE TO OUTRAGE THIS LINK HAS BEEN REMOVED BY THE AUTHOR
Not sure how good it is wel to write to cd that is but sounds cool, and till i get my hands on the original cd, this makes good listening
Enjoy!
P.S.
Those of you unfamiliar with torrent (like me) will need to download a torrent client. Avi found this one to be quite good.
http://download.utor
PPS: I have to say that one of my fav tracks so far is "Hands Held High" when you hear it you'll know why!!!
Set adrift on memory bliss... R&R part2
In this farewell,
There’s no blood,
There’s no alibi.
‘Cause I’ve drawn regret,
From the truth,
Of a thousand lies.
So let mercy come,
And wash away…
What I’ve Done.
I’ll face myself,
To cross out what I’ve become.
Erase myself,
And let go of what I've done.
So this last week and weekend brought on a heavy case of tripping down memory lane…
Not a bad thing most of the time but this week was a revolutionary rollercoaster of ups and downs…
Yah hence the title... just a reminder of PM Dawns song, and for those who came after Backstreet Boys yes did do a remake/rehash of the same song...
Careless whisper from a careless man,
A neutron dance for a neutron fan;
Marionette strings are dangerous things,
I thought of all the trouble they bring.
An eye for an eye, a spy for a spy,
Rubber bands expand in a frustrating sigh.
Tell me that shes not dreaming.
Shes got an ace in the hole,
It doesnt have meaning.
Reality used to be a friend of mine,
cause complete control, I dont take too kind.
So anyway were was i...yah the fact that i've been on this trip of late is not a bad thing.
I like my memories and i hold on to them maybe some times to fiercly but i guess they are a part of me now. they what ultimately defines the person that i've become, regardles of how people percieve the real me...its def all me!
But i ponder on the issue of friends lost...why do we lose contact with people who mean so much to us? Why do we change our relationships because we have to? Who says i still cant be your friend now that you don't live here any more? Who says because you now have a girlfriend/boyfriend/fiance/husband/wife we have to stop being the friends we were?
My questions may seem a bit arb to some of my readers but may be others can identify with what i'm trying to say.
My tripping made me realise that the way i see life is no more as it used to be. I've become a total scaredy cat eish and thats so not me!!! I'm scared to face the future knowing that i leave behind so much and so many people! Like wtf becuase i'm never scared of anything but i guess what i'm really scared of is letting go.
Yes letting go of what was and what has moved on. Sure the nature of relationships change so shouldn't i be accepting this change and hey not all cange is bad...some are really really good and some maybe needed the change so that i could realise the true friends from the false.
So i have ranted and raved for a bit but its not everything i want to say or wish to say but its okay i'll continue another time...
On to more arb notes and thoughts...YAY AC MILAN and LIVERS in UEFA finals. Makes me wonder if we'l have a repeat of last time (2005-2006 finals) or as i was reminded...some ITALIAN REVENGE...needless to say Juve'85 comes to mind (thanks to the soul who mentioned it to me!).
Another point to arb about...is I'M LOSING MY VOICE *URGH* wtf i never lose my voice my life line my life my means to communicate my saneness my ability to express....
NO COMMENT
should i even bother commenting :)
South Africa won the toss and decided to bat
South Africa Innings
149 all out (43.5 overs)
Australia Innings
153 for 3 (31.3 overs)
Heaven
Heaven in a Mug
"Feels like an angel peed on my tongue"
(Caption by - Az!)
O btw for Yas's sake....darling here goes... "I'm a Bitch with a capital C"! lol
Linkin Park (esp for Phantom)
This is especially for LINKIN PARK fans...
I did comment in my last post about the release of there single above and their new album.
This video is also awesome makes you wonder...What I've Done?!?!?!?!?
But I'll say it again...
MINUTES TO MIDNIGHT release date is 14/15 May...
This song is not exactly them but its awesome and doesnt fall short like Maroon5... they still leave me a believer :)
Mathematical Formula for a girl....:)
no its not insane...i got curly hair and i like straight hair...a ghdcosts R1500....why must i pay to "burn" my hair and going to the salon costs R100 a week x 52 weeks = 5200.00.....so its not insane .....even if have to go for a function , i don't have to go salon, just wash and go....how convenient....for 365 days ....costs R 3.28/day....a pack of cigarettes costs +/- R19.00...so if acid/arshad buys a pack every 2/3 days= +/- R 3467.50 = 288% insane if i am "insane"....and if they buy a pack a day then they get more insane.....;-))
*btw she spent 1200 (i think on her hair yday lol)
This insane mathematical formula was developed by the gorgeous Moh...she who argues the need of visiting the hair salon once a year :) Moh i understand thanks but still I wouldn't need to lol my hair is too straight, but for others of the female species i believe you should take Moh up on her formula lol
any way on a bit of an arb note...like wtf is Maroon5 thinking...yes R you can kill me later if you like but their new song reminds me totally of Backstreet Boys and N'Sync.
They gone from awesome (I own their cd) to totally pop bubble gum vomit inducing music....Yah sure the tune is catchy yah def it will stick in my head after a while but please somebody save them from themselves. Okay fine i'll wait till i hear their whole album but honestly if its more of this stuf *Zahira vomits*...then i'm def not investing in their cd...def not worth it.
*Zahira gives R death stares...* Don't even try killing me R you know I can take you down with my little finger lol
*ME EVIL*EFG* l__l
FRIENDS some old some new...all good :)
Hey last night was awesome...had a get together of old and new friends mainly bloggers...may this tradition continue...hehehe to those who didnt make it or we didnt have contact info sorry drop a line maybe next time we'll see you there...but hey to the guys who were thank you...lets just say there would never be a dull moment between insane crazy peeps :) mwah
*ME EVIL*EFG* l__l
| Your Element Is Air |
 You dislike conflict, and you've been able to rise above the angst of the world. And when things don't go your way, you know they'll blow over quickly. Easygoing, you tend to find joy from the simple things in life. You roll with the punches, and as a result, your life is light and cheerful. You find it easy to adapt to most situations, and you're an open person. With you, what you see is what you get... and people love that! |
My Dream
Would Some one please buy me these bikes!!!!!!!
The new 1098 S has achieved the status of the highest performance Ducati street bike ever by reducing weight to the max and adding world-class components to an already record-breaking design. If owning the ultimate Superbike is your dream, the ‘S’ is ready to deliver."
Family Bonding...
I’m sitting watching cricket and soccer with my dad, actually we fighting over the remote, but this is not what’s making me write this.
Out of the blue my dad decides to remind me of the fact that I can’t sing. Yes people I can’t hold a note to save my life. He reminds me of a time long gone. When I was small my dad used to tease and taunt (how cruel) me about the fact I couldn’t sing. It used to be so horrid that I used to sit in the corner of our dining room on the window sill and cry and shout that I could sing better then him…Imagine a chubby little child with tears flowing down her cheeks proclaiming to the world she could sing. How incredibly reminiscent I feel right now. I actually long for that time again.
But yes daddy dearest was right I still can’t sing lol never could then never can now…
And why all this well he laughs telling me I listen to too much music but I still can’t sing *sigh*
*evil daddy just evil*
*ME EVIL*EFG* l__l
Rant and Rave (R&R)
Yah this is the kind of R&R i want...
A place where i can release built up frustration, and some how sooth and calm my soul.
So what you may i ask do i wish to R&R about...hmmm lots and at the same time nothing at all! yah exactly i want to R&R about the nothingness part of it all.
I was standing at the bus stop the other day... yes people i wait at the bus stop...and i was just enjoying the moment of solitude. Watched the cars go by and the buses (I was waiting for the mother peole!!!) and wondering how they seemed to pollute the same f%$^ing air I was breathing, but thats not the issue here. The issue is that i was actually enjoying this alone time of people, bus and car and the occasional bike watching. I could see people laughing, talking, fighting and kissing (Bus stop is near a robot sillys) in their cars. How differently we all see the world move by.
The other totally soothing thing about watching all this was that it began to drizzle. Me i love the rain (I LOVE H2O). Was desperatly wanting to play in the rain. Can you imagine me running between cars lol how much fun would that be...except on a main road i may get jailed *sigh*.
So have i gone off on a tangent or are you guys still following along in my mud?
The whole point of the above is to enjoy the simple things in life. And everything has its own beauty even the ugly.
My other R&R has to do with the fact that my friends don't seem to enjoy each moment as it comes. Why do they have to place in context with something else? Like I know sometimes i do that as well, but honestly can one not enjoy a moment with out worrying about someone else or something else or thinking if only the situation was different?
Are all humans ingrained withthis sense of 'publicity'? hmmm
O well screw them and screw the world i'm gonna enjoy each moment as is and when ever it throws itself at me...why bloody not?
I will def continue this R&R session...I feel so much better already :)
*ME EVIL*EFG* l__l
(for those who get it...to those who don't f^&k this shit don't make your problems mine!!!)
Tolkien's NEW book
Hey to all the Tolkien fans (me included) just thought I inform you of the great new development...I for one can't wait to get my grubby hands on it...after LOTR I hope this is a hit...heres a snippet about events unfolding...
J.R.R. Tolkien Has a New Book Coming Out
Just because he's dead doesn't mean he doesn't have a new book coming out. A new, previously unpublished work by J.R.R. Tolkien will hit bookstores in April, 2007.
Houghton Mifflin has acquired U.S. rights to publish the first complete book by J.R.R. Tolkien since the posthumous Silmarillion in 1977. HM bought American rights to The Children of Hürin from HarperCollins UK, which acquired the project from The Tolkien Estate in a world rights deal. Hürin, begun in 1918, was reconstructed by Christopher Tolkien, painstakingly editing together the complete work from his father’s many drafts, this book is the culmination of a 30-year endeavor by him to bring J.R.R. Tolkien’s vast body of unpublished work to a wide audience. HM will publish Hürin in April 2007, on the same day as HarperCollins' international editions. Janet Silver, v-p and publisher of Houghton Mifflin, said, "As J.R.R. Tolkien's original American publisher, dating back to The Hobbit, we are extremely proudto be bringing thisproject to Tolkien's devoted readership in the United States."
Actually, we're quite happy that Christopher Tolkien is taking the time to ensure that all of his father's work is finally published.
Where I want to be....
Hmmm wouldn't it be just purrfect to be there rite now and all innocent and relaxed...mmmm
Cricket Bloody Cricket...
Chamara Silva dives for his crease but is run out by Herschelle Gibbs in a move reminiscent of Jonty RhodesUntil Malinga came in with some awesome bowling...all we needed was 4 runs i tell ya...just 4 but SA had to go and give people heart attacks, I don't get these guys. First Kallis goes then we drop 3 more wickets and there we all thinking we losing...hmmm I feel sorry for the tail enders. Imagine the pressure for them and what a dose of adrenaline they getting. The ultimate flying drug coursing through their veins. Even Polly couldn't watch the end. What amazing tension...
But what superb bowling by Malinga.
All credit goes to him, I mean we were definitely cruising to a win till he came back with a vengeance. O and not forgetting VAAS. And Langerveldt. They definitely made the cricket yesterday entertaining...Otherwise it was turning into the rest of this WC totally boring (minus the killing of Woolmer and the upset wins against India and Pakistan)...
All In all I'd say SA were damn lucky
My Mood Right Now....
Evanescence - Lithium
Lithium, don't want to lock me up inside.
Lithium, don't want to forget how it feels without...
Lithium, I want to stay in love with my sorrow.
Oh, but God, I want to let it go.
Come to bed, don't make me sleep alone.
Couldn't hide the emptiness, you let it show.
Never wanted it to be so cold.
Just didn't drink enough to say you love me.
I can't hold on to me,
Wonder what's wrong with me.
Lithium, don't want to lock me up inside.
Lithium, don't want to forget how it feels without...
Lithium, I want to stay in love with my sorrow.
Don't want to let it lay me down this time.
Drown my will to fly.
Here in the darkness I know myself.
Can't break free until I let it go.
Let me go.
Darling, I forgive you after all.
Anything is better than to be alone.
And in the end I guess I had to fall.
Always find my place among the ashes.
I can't hold on to me,
Wonder what's wrong with me.
Lithium, don't want to lock me up inside.
Lithium, don't want to forget how it feels without...
Lithium,...stay in love with my sorrow.
I'm gonna let it go.
****Need I say more.....
This Song epitomises my feelings...my emotions and my life...my anthem....
Me...In A Nut Shell...or just Shelly...hmmmm
LOl Been checking this on peoples pages decided to try it out...quiet interesting results i get lol
Concerning Love Letters...
So Juns, finally decided to accompany me to the Time of the Writer’, which incidentally is running in its 10th year (I’m sure many people can not believe that fact!). That and the Film festival at campus are my two favorite things to go for… yes people I like all this cultural intelligence…
So I’m guessing you all wondering why the title for this blog piece…
Well Juns, I had a feeling, was highly bored during the whole process, even though he emphatically states he was not. (You know when a guy is lying when he keeps telling you otherwise) But I let him continue to believe he was impressing me ;) lol Just joking Juns stop having a heart attack…we already know what you think about it you posted on your blog already…Though is it the message or the medium you wish to acknowledge ;)
Dudes relax I’m getting to my point here….
Juns…bored…whips out a pen…hmmm is this for some note taking…
No?!?!?!?
Grabs Zoë’s hand…like dude what are you thinking…please no kinky business in the middle of the theatre…
Hmmm is this the art of branding you wish to portray…yes people he wanted to brand Zoë’s lovely delicate hand…Quickly she snatches it back before the skillful artistic talent of Juns comes into being…
Zoë opens her bag whips out a tiny ‘purple’ (wonder what she thinking) notebook and hands it to Juns…the result…
well take a look below…
PS: Juns finally understands XOXOXOXOXO
Laughter makes the world go round
Have no idea if this will play but you guys have to check him out...his one brilliant comedian...and if anyone can identify him please inform me...:)
Also heres the url in case lol
Tags...Bleh
- I love dring manual cars and i drive fast very fast when ever where ever i am...shuu don't tell the cops...i clocked 220km/h (i think) hmmm not bad hey...anyone wants a race...BRING IT ON!
- I have a beauty spot in a very secretive place...don't even ask lol ;)
- I enjoy solitude...yes to all my peeps who know me...I LIKE AND ENJOY BEING ALONE...
- I love sports more than anything...yes i know this is something everyone knows but what they don't know is i'm conidering taking my FIFA coaching exams...
- I'm an Oscar winner lol...seriously i was told i'm the best at hiding my emotions lol...who would ever think that...
So yah hope you guys got more insight into my life lol...
I TAG
(hmmm this is a toughie)
ad amazingly I don't know who else to tag because they already tag'd lol
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Age...
does age really matter...
who says we have to make age matter?
how come society dictates that we should live by the age factor?
been having this conversation with a friend a few years younger then me and was wondering how is it that we are able to be such good friends pass the age barrier but as soon as we talk about a guy its inherent that I don't feel comfortable dating one younger than me. I know that the Prophet (SAW) was younger than Khadija (RA) but that still does not change the fact that i view life in this way.
Wedding Fun...
A1
Crash! Boom! Bang!Yah so I went to the A1 it was F&^$ing awesome...But that was me. I love cars and bikes...and the roar of those car downshifting from speeds of 220 to 100 to take the bend or making it through the chicane without blowing their undercarriage was amazing.
The sun though did kill me... i have permanent sunglasses at the moment but I don't care I'd do the same thing over again just to hear the roar of an A1 (next time hopefully F1) car. Not forgetting the super cars they had after the main race...totally yummy...think Lambos and lotuses, Porches and even an Aston martin...totally mind blowing...
End of an era....
Hmmm i think I'm a bit off the mark on my heading there but let me get to the point...I no more belong to the campus world. I'm trying to figure out whether that's a good or a bad thing. *Zahira sits in deep thought reflecting on her last 4 or is it 5 years on campus*
I think its a good thing right now. Why? (and I know all you working people are def asking why!!) well maybe because every single person on campus seems to be getting younger o and the fact that all my friends are not there anymore so the only point of going to campus would actually be to do some work. Which was definitely so not me. I'm a socialite what can i say.
Hmmm I’m getting that feeling…you know the one you felt when you completed matric and moved on to the next step in your life…but this feeling is a little different.
This is me all grown up now…okay okay not completely grownup but well just a wee bit. To those I haven’t seen in ages apparently I have grown up those I see to mush off lol know better.
Campus has thought me lots among those is to love and let love walk away. Also the good and the bad. To cry and to hold on and to fight (yah I did lots of fighting on campus with everyone lol lecturers and friends o and enemies ;)) Also I’ve seen friends die and others learn to live again. And most of all I learnt what true friends and family means. I know the friends I made on campus are my friends for life. I may never see them or speak to them but if I ever needed them they’d come running. They no my faults and still love me for who I am….I love you guys!
Bring on the Future I’m ready for it!!!
Zahira
PS: Hersh you always in my heart and I’ll never forget you MWAH
BEDTIME POEMS --For BIG Kids
Following on MJADS concerning poems from childhood thought these would interest you guys.
Mary had a little pig,
She kept it fat and plastered;
And when the price of pork went up,
She shot the little bastard.
MARY HAD A LITTLE LAMB
Her father shot it dead.
Now it goes to school with her,
Between two hunks of bread.
JACK AND JILL Went up the hill
To have a little fun.
Stupid Jill forgot the pill
And now they have a son.
HUMPTY DUMPTY sat on a wall,
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the kings' horses,
And all the kings' men.
Had scrambled eggs,
For breakfast again.
HEY DIDDLE, DIDDLE the cat took a piddle,
All over the bedside clock.
The little dog laughed to see such fun.
Then died of electric shock.
GEORGIE PORGY Pudding and Pie,
Kissed the girls and made them cry.
And when the boys came out to play,
He kissed them too 'cause he was gay.
There was a little girl who had a little curl
Right in the middle of her forehead.
When she was good, she was very, very good.
But when she was bad...
She got a fur coat, jewels, a waterfront condo, and a sports car.
Confucius
Confucius say...
Man who wants pretty nurse, must be patient.
Confucius say...
Passionate kiss, like spider web, lead to undoing of fly.
Confucius say...
Better to be pissed off than pissed on.
Confucius say...
He who walk through airport door sideways going to Bangkok.
Confucius say...
Boy who go to sleep with stiff problem wake up with solution in hand.
Confucius say...
Girl who sits on Judge's lap gets honourable discharge.
Confucius say....
Lady who go camping must beware of evil intent.
Confucius say...
Man who keep feet firmly on ground have trouble putting on pants.
Confucius say...
Squirrel who runs up woman's leg not find nuts.
Confucius say...
He who run behind bus get exhausted.
Confucius say...
Man who leap off cliff jump to conclusion.
Confucius say...
Man with tight trousers is pressing his luck.
Confucius say...
He who fishes in others' holes often catches crabs.
Confucius say...
All women look same in dark
Holidays...continued...
Apparently I'm supposed to write the continuation of my holiday post but I just can't seem to get around to doing it :)
After the wedding was the Walimah in Durban, a week later... so was even better then making the way to Jhb...
So this is the cousins yah mainly us girls with the one boy in the family who loves taking photos.
The holidays after that continued making me a total beach bum, especially since the Jhb cousins being around.
Not forgetting that Eid fell in between. Eid was a glorious family affair especially since a lot of the cousins from around SA were together after ages.
That night being new years was weird...we ended up at the beachfront though it was pouring, at my cousins place. All we did was stand on the balcony and carry on like kids...shouting at everyone passing by..was so much of fun :)
....More to follow....
